Back To Normal

There’s been a lot of talk lately about going back to normal once we get the pandemic under control, but what does that actually mean? What if I’m not ready for any kind of normal?

The last year has been incredibly stressful and traumatic for everyone, there’s no doubting that. However, I think there is something to be said about how we’ve all sort of gotten used to being in this mode of survival. Wearing masks, working from home, social distancing—it all seems normal now, right?

It’s a very weird thing, feeling something that is definitely not normal become normal. The idea of not wearing a mask when I go out is jarring to me now, and I know that I’m going to panic every time I walk out the door or am about to go into a store that I don’t have a mask with me.

But still, no matter how much I can’t wait for this to be over, I am hesitant about what happens next.

Recently I’ve been feeling a lot of anxiety about things going back to “normal”—whatever that mean. It’s been so long since I’ve sat in a real classroom with other students, what’s it going to be like to do it again? Being in an enclosed space with a larger group of people sounds unheard of at this point, and we’re just going to have to do it and pretend we’ve done it the whole time.

There’s also part of me that doesn’t think things ever will go back to normal. I know that eventually it will. A majority of people will be vaccinated, and even if we still have to wear masks for a little longer I think it’s worth it, I really do. I also hope that we will all one day be able to agree that we made mistakes during this pandemic, and hopefully if something like this happens again in our lifetimes, work at it as a team, not as two different sides. I hope that science will be seen as something to be trusted, not doubted and feared.

I guess what I’m saying is, I hope we can do better than this. I’d like to say I know we can do better, but honestly I don’t know that.

Stay safe, everyone. We’re getting closer, just stay strong.

—Abbie